I was very much disappointed; I thought I should have seen him hanged.
Context: Selwyn, known for his morbid fascination with public executions, reportedly made this remark after traveling to see a hanging, only to find the condemned man had received a reprieve at the last moment.
I am glad to hear that. I always loved a Lord.
Context: This dark jest was attributed to Selwyn when he was informed that a mutual acquaintance, upon his death, had unexpectedly inherited a peerage. It's a cynical comment on his supposed enjoyment of attending the funerals of the nobility.
I am very glad of it; I thought it was the French.
Context: When roused from his sleep by the shock of an earthquake in London, Selwyn purportedly made this quip, humorously implying that an invasion by the French was a far more terrifying prospect.
It was a very good sermon, if you were a sinner.
Context: Selwyn's witty and often sarcastic response to a friend who had complained about the dullness of a particular sermon, implying that the sermon's true value or impact depended entirely on the listener's moral standing.
But you have the advantage of him; you can cut him up, and so dispose of him.
Context: A chillingly witty remark made by Selwyn when a French cook, attending a dying gentleman, lamented, 'Monsieur, il est mort, et nous sommes foutus.' Selwyn's reply highlighted his characteristically dark and macabre sense of humor.
It is the only way I can be sure of seeing a great man come to a proper end.
Context: Selwyn's cynical justification for his attendance at public executions, suggesting that it was the only guaranteed occasion to witness figures of power truly face their ultimate fate and a definitive conclusion to their lives.
He leaves all he has to the devil, and his soul to the Attorney-General.
Context: Selwyn's biting assessment of the will of an acquaintance, humorously implying that the deceased had left behind a morally corrupt legacy and a complicated legal mess for the legal system to untangle.
I would rather be at the play, for I can sleep there without being laughed at.
Context: When asked if he would prefer a dull parliamentary debate or a boring play, Selwyn chose the latter. He humorously suggested that sleeping through a play was less subject to public ridicule than sleeping in the House of Commons.
The man is so vain, he would be pleased to hear he had a bad character, provided it were a character.
Context: A critical observation by Selwyn on the extreme vanity of an acquaintance, suggesting that some individuals prefer notoriety of any kind over complete anonymity or lack of recognition.
His taste is so bad, he prefers the conversation of his equals.
Context: A typically elitist and witty jab from Selwyn, implying that a certain person lacked discernment by choosing company of less intellectual or social standing, rather than aspiring to higher circles like Selwyn's own.
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